Following God's Call

Holly and I recently attended the Steven Curtis Chapman concert. We were not huge SCC fans, and really went to see Chris Tomlin. SCC and Casting Crowns were really just a bonus for us. I have two SCC CD's, and have always liked most of his music. I'm a big fan now.

SCC gave his family's story of how they have been blessed through international adoption. His family has three adopted daughters from China. His testimony was extremely moving to me. I have thought in recent years that we should consider adopting a child from China, but have always put it out of my head, rationalizing that our family is "perfect" just the way it is - one boy, one girl; we can just afford to pay tuition for private Christian school, etc. At the end of his testimony he encouraged the audience to financially support adoption through his foundation. An intermission immediately followed his testimony. I sat back in my chair and said to Holly, "We have to do that." "Do what?" she asked. "Adopt a baby from China," I answered. She completely agreed, almost relieved at what I had said.

We spent the next week or so in prayer over this, and feel that God is truly in this. So the process has begun. We are investigating agencies, reading testimonials from families who have been through this, and talking with friends who have adopted or are in the process of adopting from China. We are strangely at peace with all of this. We do not have the financial resources at our disposal to go through this. It will be a financial sacrifice. But God is faithful.

I will be updating our progress through this process from time to time. In the mean time, anyone who reads this blog, please do one thing: pray. Pray that God will open the floodgates for this effort, and that we will find the funds necessary to make this happen...that we will remain diligent in our efforts...and that we will continue to follow His call.

I leave with you the words that SCC wrote after the adoption of his first daughter, Shaohannah:

I know you've heard the stories

But they all sound too good to be true

You've heard about a place called home

But there doesn't seem to be one for you

So one more night you cry yourself to sleep

And drift off to a distant dream

Where love takes you in and everything changes

A miracle starts with the beat of a heart

When love takes you home and says you belong here

The loneliness ends and a new life begins

When love takes you in

And somewhere while you're sleeping

Someone else is dreaming too

Counting down the days until

They hold you close and say I love you

And like the rain that falls into the sea

In a moment what has been is lost in what will be

When love takes you in everything changes

A miracle starts with the beat of a heart

And this love will never let you go

There is nothing that could ever cause this love to lose its hold

When love takes you in everything changes

A miracle starts with the beat of a heart

When love takes you home and says you belong here

The loneliness ends and a new life begins

When love takes you in it takes you in for good

When love takes you in

What is God calling you to do? Will you follow Him?

Obedience and Surrender

This is not an easy one. It doesn't matter who you are, where you've been, or where you're going. Saying "no" to ourselves is not natural for us. We want to satisfy desires, enjoy life, and plan for the next indulgence. I love to eat out, have nice things, and go great places, and anticipate the next big thing. Lately I have been thinking about my own obedience and have realized that I have not been reliant on my Father to sustain me. I haven't completely surrendered. I want more. I'm sorry.

I want to be obedient. I love what Paul says in Romans 7:14-25 about the struggle between the heart and the mind and how that relates to sin. Any sin or struggle will do, really. "I know I'm rotten through and through so far as my sinful nature is concerned...I try not to do wrong, but I do it anyway...the sin within me is doing it...I love God's law with all my heart. But there is another law at work within me that is at war with my mind...Who will free me from this...? thank God! The answer is Jesus Christ our Lord."

Obedience requires surrender. Neither is easy. Faith is crucial to both. Childlike faith. When I think of childlike faith, I remember putting Braden on my shoulders as a young child (I'm talking under 2 years of age). He would ride around up there without holding on to my head, flailing his arms about, his dad only holding on to his feet. Until one day when his faith was broken. In an attempt to have a little fun, the faith of a child was broken by his father. While Braden was on my shoulders, riding around, wiggling and giggling, I thought it would be a "rush" for him if I jolted him back, just a little. He reached out and grabbed on to my head with a vice-like grip. I could hardly pry his little fingers from around my neck to get him off. He was scared. He had been exposed to the possibility that his father would let him fall. From then on, when he rode on my shoulders, he hung on. Shame on me, huh? (Just to let you know, Braden is fine now.)

Life experiences cause us to become distrustful of others. Someone takes credit for our idea. A friend betrays. A spouse leaves. We build walls of protection around ourselves and don't want to get burned again. We need to constantly remind ourselves that we can trust God by surrendering to Him and through our obedience to Him. A relationship with Him is unlike any earthly relationship we will ever have. Earthly relationships, no matter how healthy and loving, lead to some level of disappointment. An intimate relationship with God leads to blessing after blessing in all areas of our lives when we wait on Him.

Father, I want to be obedient to You. Help me to surrender to You again and again. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute.

Nine Years Ago

My son Braden turned nine years old on Saturday. It is so hard to believe that it has been nine years since he came into this world. I can remember his coming like it was much more recent than that. He was born about six weeks early, and Holly and I were fearful that early April Fool's morning that we knew she had gone into labor. Fear didn't last long, though. I felt a real peace about the entire situation. Holly and I had prayed diligently for a child, and we had been through a great deal before she got pregnant with him. He was born healthy and happy and came home right away. God answered our prayers. Since then we have prayed that God would guide us as we raise Braden, and that He write His name on Braden's heart.

He grew and developed like any other child, and started in the Three Year Old Class at Southwest Christian School. He is still there, in the third grade. His attention to detail and his desire to learn are really amazing to me. Braden enjoys science and history, especially anything that is extreme or has a significant story - Titanic, Hindenburg, Lusitania (yes, even as a first grader he was interested in the Lusitania), volcanos, earthquakes, etc. He loves to read about these types of things and find out even more information about whatever he is into at the time.

Braden is also very tender-hearted and caring. He is always concerned about others, making sure that everyone is included. He's a good guy, and I am proud to be his dad. He is by no means perfect. He has a lot of fun and enjoys life, makes mistakes, and even forgets to turn in an assignment from time to time. He's a normal kid, but pretty exceptional to me.

God continues to answer prayers.